Coming out of hiding: the aftereffects
When I first realized I had a people-pleasing problem due to suffering from the spirit of rejection and that I spent most of my life running from my destiny because of it, I felt ashamed. I was distraught and questioned why I didn’t pay more attention to the signs. Deep down, I understood that I suppressed the truth and lived in denial because facing reality meant my life would be disrupted. I would have to walk away from what made me comfortable, which was scary because I was used to controlling my comfort level. Nevertheless, I had to decide to come out of hiding and deal with the aftereffects, no matter how challenging. We run from chaos rather than becoming solutionist amidst chaos because we fear the pressure that comes with change and becoming. Also, we must constantly release, let go, surrender and say yes to God and no to our fleshly desires. It’s a battle not for the faint of heart but for those willing to go up no matter the cost.
When I think of Chaos, blessings, and promotions, I’m reminded of Hannah in the Bible. She was bitter, resentful, and ashamed that she could not give birth to a child, but Penniah (her husband’s other wife) was, and Penniah teased her for it. One day, Hannah had enough and released all the pain she hid from God in His presence. “So Hannah arose after they had finished eating and drinking in Shiloh. Now Eli the priest was sitting on the seat by the doorpost of the tabernacle of the Lord. And she was in bitterness of soul, and prayed to the Lord and wept in anguish. Then she made a vow and said, “O Lord of hosts, if You will indeed look on the affliction of Your maidservant and remember me, and not forget Your maidservant, but will give Your maidservant a male child, then I will give him to the Lord all the days of his life, and no razor shall come upon his head” 1 Samuel 9:11 (NKJV).
Hannah was so radical in her outpouring to God that the priest Eli mistook her for being drunk (in your healing stage, make no apologies for how extreme you become). Still, it was in her messy state, her brokenness, that God blessed her womb. She finally gave birth to a son, and his name was Samuel. To honor God, she willingly gave up her son (to gain, we must also lose). The Bible portrays that it was a dark and chaotic time when Samuel was born. The current priest Eli had allowed his sons to rob God’s offering and cheat His people. Thus, God was going to take the Israelites through a transition in leadership to bring back righteousness. Nevertheless, God blessed and favored Hannah even more while all this was taking place. “And the Lord visited Hannah, so that she conceived and bore three sons and two daughters. Meanwhile the child Samuel grew before the Lord” 1 Samuel 2:21 (NKJV). Hannah went through a dark season before she could rejoice in her season of new.
I want you to know that coming out of hiding means you will have to experience loss, a few disappointments, some setbacks, and people. You will have to break down before your breakthrough. However, there is so much more that you will gain. You’ll have peace that surpasses all understanding, you will no longer work to earn God’s love, you’ll tap into your God-given authority, creativity, wealth, and riches, and you’ll have a renewed mindset. Moreover, God will place you in a community of people that desire you to be your true self.
It’s only a matter of time until the chaos ceases, but while you’re in it. Face it head-on.
I’m praying for you!
Be Encouraged,
Love Monica
